People say "We support whatever lifestyle your
daughter chooses."
We say... gently but directly... "She doesn't
have a lifestyle. She has a life. A good one with someone she loves, and
we are delighted."
(Hint: Don't argue. Just repeat or say these
again in a similar way- firmly and sincerely.)
People say, "We love the sinner and hate the
sin."
We say, "We know some people think that being
gay is a sin, but we don't."
People say, "Do you think being gay is
biological?"
We say, "We don't know, and we don't care. We
are glad to have so many wonderful gay people in our lives. They are the
people to whom we go for unconditional love."
People say, "That's so gay."
We say, "I am not clear what you mean. Can
you explain?" We say, "People I care about are gay. I am not
okay with your using the word this way." We can say, "It
sounds like you must mean something else. Can you think of a better
word?"
People say, "I'm not comfortable with gay
people."
We say, "That's too bad. We find them to be
accepting of others. We have learned about unconditional love from our
gay friends and family members." We say, " Maybe they are not
comfortable with you and don't feel safe. That makes it hard to be very
real with someone."
People say, "I am okay with gay people if they
don't flaunt it. Why do they have to throw it in our face?"
We say, "We believe all people should have
the same rights, and all people should be respectful of others no matter
what their orientation."
People say, "I think being gay is gross and
disgusting."
We say, "People are often uncomfortable about
sexuality. This is private behavior and that is true no matter one's
orientation. It is none of our business."
People ask in a rude way trying to be funny or
confront us, "Are you gay?"
We can say, "Why would you ask such a
personal, inappropriate question?"
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